motherhood, relationships

All the emotions!!!

Just when I thought I had it all figured out and life with two kids wasn’t looking too shabby…this happened!

And while I’m dealing with all the feelings that come with a surprise third pregnancy and a child under two, it seems it has also been an invitation to the most outrageous reactions from people. And of course, I have to tell you about it.

Sooooo, seeing those two lines appear on that stick was a shock to say the least. But honestly, now that the initial panic is wearing off papa and I couldn’t be happier. Even a bit excited. And even more so as we will be welcoming one more baby boy into our family. And we all know that papa and I make the cutest and coolest little dudes! Ha!

But while we are in fact excited, one minute making plans, discussing names and imagining life with three kids, we’re also downright terrified.

Because we never thought, in a million years, we would be planning life with three kids. In fact, we had other plans. Lots of traveling, home renovations, more free time, date nights, quiet afternoon coffee meetings with friends.

For me, personally, emotions have been all over the place since I peed on that little stick. Because there are times when I feel I am mourning a life I thought I would have and then the next day I can hardly catch my breath because I am so excited about the adventure that awaits us.

And while I’m dealing with all these emotions, I run into a friend, tell them I’m pregnant and receive an open-mouth reaction similar to one you’d expect if someone had just announced a death. After this happened one too many times, I thought it was about me. Being paranoid, hormonal, dare I say. But no. Apparently women are subjected to this type of ‘bullying’ all the time. I don’t get! Do you really care about what’s going on in my uterus? Or how many people are sleeping under my roof?

Now let’s add on to this the fact that I am expecting another boy. Here are some of the golden reactions/comments I have received regarding the gender of my third baby:

Oh no!

You poor thing!

At least tell me it’s a girl!

You know, in some countries gender selection is allowed after you have three of the same sex.

Personally, I would never wish for three boys.

 

I’m ashamed to admit that instead of telling them to mind their own business and since when do they have a right to express any kind of opinion on another person’s family, I have reached the point where I sometimes say ‘I don’t know’. Just to avoid a nasty comment that will often be said when Georgie is present. ‘Mama, why did that lady say that my baby brother should have been a girl?’

And then thankfully, there have been the wonderful few who have shown and expressed genuine happiness – you know who you are. They’ve talked me down from the ledge, told me I will rock at being a boy mama and that I can absolutely do this. They’ve smiled and hugged me when I tell them the news and tell me all about the wonders that come with having three children.

When I first sat down to write this pregnancy announcement, it was short, sweet and to the point. And I wanted to keep it that way but as the weeks went by and I found myself at the receiving end of comments I find highly inappropriate, I felt I had to say something. Because if even one person reading this realises how much their personal opinion about the matter of a pregnancy and/or the gender of a baby that isn’t theirs (!) can affect a woman expecting then perhaps the next time they will refrain from saying anything but a simple Congratulations.


Did people comment on your pregnancy? Tell me about it!

You can also read my blog post on gender disappointment here.

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6 Comments

  • Reply Hannah September 30, 2017 at 4:38 pm

    I don’t have kids but I am one of three. Growing up with two other partners in crime was great. As an adult, I always have at least one other person to lean on who gets me, has had the same start of life experiences and understands the complaints I have about family member A who dared to say this or that. It was a lovely experience and I enjoy being one of three. So your boys are gonna rock it and it will be great!

    People are so judgy about your uterus. All that matters is that a. You are doing ok with the surprise mentally and physically that b. You think you can provide a solid home and beautiful life for your new addition and c. That you will love this baby.

    It doesn’t matter whether it’s a boy or girl. We don’t know the paths babies will take as they grow. It’s a beautiful experience for you regardless. Your home is filled with love, it’s filled with very beautiful people, and you are a good mama. Sometimes I wonder if you want to adopt me too.

    Best wishes through the pregnancy from one curly haired lady to another xxxx

    • Reply georgie's mummy October 13, 2017 at 6:03 am

      Why am I just seeing this comment? Thank you so so much for your beautiful words my lovely online friend! much love to you always xxx

  • Reply Christine October 30, 2017 at 11:27 am

    Firstly a massive Congratulations and secondly thank you so much for sharing this wonderful and fun experience with us all. The reactions definitely made me laugh. A tongue in cheek honest account. Brilliant!

    • Reply georgie's mummy November 2, 2017 at 7:02 am

      I love it when readers get me! Thank you for your kind words. x

  • Reply Gigi October 30, 2017 at 1:07 pm

    Congratulations to you! What’s better than having two boys? Having three! Enjoy your pregnancy and know that all that matters is the feelings and heartbeats of those little ones that share your home with you. I’m also pregnant at the moment with a boy (my first) and we couldn’t be happier, but people around us make comments all the time. You see, after surviving all those “are you thinking of having children any time soon?” comments, we now have to face the following reactions from some people: “was it a planned pregnancy?”, “Ohh it’s a boy i bet your husband is thrilled!”, “So you’re naming him after your father in-law right?” And lots of “Oh finally!”and just like you I was gracious and kind and said things like “we are both excited and haven’t really thought of names so far” despite wanting to respond to them with what perhaps they really deserved. As if all those months of trying weren’t hard enough, you’d think that at least when you’re pregnant people would be a bit more considerate. So just focus on your family and on being excited as you should be. I’m one of three and my husband one of four and we both agree that having siblings is like coming into the world with free friends for life! All the best x Gigi

    • Reply georgie's mummy November 2, 2017 at 7:06 am

      Your last sentence gave me goosebumps. I couldn’t agree more. i am one of six! and yes, yes, yes to everything else you mention. congratulations on your pregnancy! such a precious time so go ahead and enjoy it. and welcome to life as a boy mama! frankly, it rocks! much love to you Gigi.

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