Hmm. So it seems I haven’t been blogging much lately. You see, there’s not much energy left after a full day of being a mama, so there’s no way I can even make up a sentence in my head let alone write it down. But as I said, it’s energy and right now I am doing a lot to shift that energy and not even get pissed off at the fact that at this very moment, my dog is licking my feet. I just don’t like it! BUT. Shifting gear and giving you a little blog post on life lately.
OK I have to get this out now because I am so bloody proud of myself for completely a 21-day meditation challenge! It’s something I have always wanted to do, to test my mental limits and allow space for the mental chatter to quiet down. It’s been amazing. Once I nailed down a routine I was on my way. I wasn’t practicing much yoga during those 21 days but my body was craving movement so I switched to a low impact no jumping exercise routine with the help of YouTube. Favourite videos so far are by Emi Wong. So once I honed in on a 20-minute max video, I would sweat my eyeballs out and then sit down for a 10-15 minute meditation. This is the one I did, sent to me by a dear friend -Thank you!- by Deepak Chopra. Currently on the search for a new challenge.
I have become a fan of face masks. I use a green clay French one I can’t remember the name of and this rice flour and turmeric mask is incredible.
Homeschooling is a bitch. And it’s hard to talk about without considering how my experience with this matter may affect Georgie in the future so I’ll just say, if something like this may actually be in OUR future then we need to find another way to make it work. Because right now, it may be effective and efficient for some but the vibe I am getting from social media aka mums aka the source, is that it’s not. For the many it’s really fucking hard especially when we have a household to run, perhaps even a business AND more children, most of them little and in need of constant care. I am not a teacher, I suck at maths -it’s actually embarrassing just how much- and I have very little patience with numerous emails, passwords, usernames, projects and assignments.
Lockdown memories: I ugly-cried the day my favourite cup broke.
Let’s put the academics to the side for a moment and concentrate on everything else I have been experiencing with my boys. The two little ones, James 4 and Danny 2 years old are thick as thieves. Georgie was an only child for 5 years so raising two little ones under four is a brand spanking new eye-opener. Honestly, they live in their own little world and those moments when I get to witness it, are truly one of the best moments ever. Somehow that makes it OK that half of my kitchen utensil drawer is in the garden right now probably buried by the dog under a tree. I smile when I see James has cut his own fringe, snipped at the root of his forehead. That shifting of the energy I was talking about earlier…yeah not much I can do now I tell myself, except marvel at his braveness and autonomy. And how he still looks fucking cute.
Wild and carefree, my James.
Georgie is 9. He was seven months old when I started writing this blog and now he’s talking with classmates in an online chatroom. It’s enough to make my head spin. Lockdown has been hard on him, the lack of social interactions took its toll, we both had meltdowns and cried in each other’s arms. He’s currently reading his first Harry Potter book and even baked scones, on his own, one afternoon, when I decided to trust that he knew he could do it and let go of the control. It was a truly magical moment.
He looked at us and said: Mamma I’m tall! I’m almost as tall as you! Didn’t have the heart to tell my boy he was comparing himself to a hobbit.
We’ve established somewhat of a routine during these past two weeks. Breakfast is followed by 15 minutes of nonstop swing time so I get a good little arm workout too, bright and early. Georgie has morning online classes so my mornings are spent outside in the garden, reading, writing, serving snacks and then serving more snacks, or upstairs in the bedrooms where I try to clean out a cupboard or a sock drawer with the two little ones squeezing toothpaste at each other in the bathroom. Seriously, toothpaste and kitchen utensils! Why? Why?
My hair grew out of control during lockdown. It was so heavy towards the end that my roots just flattened. And then there was all this hair.around me. Impossible to wash -my arms literally ached- but it made for a good topknot though.
Our evening routine has remained the same since before lockdown. If you’ve been reading this blog since I started way back when I first became a mum then you’ll know that Georgie did not like to sleep. He just refused to sleep, didn’t know how to, didn’t want to…Knowing what I know now, this nightmare that I went through the first six months of being a mother – it was also really nice but it was exhausting ok? fucking exhausting – could have been spent in a dream cloud but it didn’t and instead it showed me how precious sleep is and how invaluable time for myself is. I became obsessed with teaching my son how to sleep. Since then I have discovered that a well-rested child and a well-rested parent is a match made in heaven. At least for me it is, so Danny is in bed by 6 pm – no nap during the day- and James, by 7. And I can eat my dinner uninterrupted, maybe even watch a horror movie, not to mention get started on the trillion other things that need to be done.
The day Danny and James made orange juice. This one, two years old, my last baby but learning so much from him. Like kids will spit in your face when you lean in for a kiss.
And to round up my lockdown farewell post, incredibly amazing things have been happening with the podcast, Mamma Mu. After a couple of weeks of being in isolation with three kids, I was asked to share my experiences on an online TV platform. Black Lemon Tv is the first web-based platform with its own independent productions and their programming includes interview shows, something that was quite popular during lockdown for obvious reasons. Basically, any business or person that had an online presence before COVID-19 has grown rapidly . I know my numbers picked up during this time, contributed/sponsored posts were pouring in and the connections I have made have been deep, hopeful and in tune with my creative needs. Which is why I decided to show my face on camera and actually talk, with someone I have never met before, about the drama that is unfolding before my very tired, puffy and dark eyes. I wore mascara for that first interview because duh!
Books have been a good companion to me during this time and this book could not have come at a better time. Knee-deep in lockdown and laundry, it was nice to have a guide and sound advice. Highly recommended.
Whatever I mumbled through not-my-best greek and exhaustion, made sense to the guys over at Black Lemon Tv so they offered me a weekly slot on the spot. Since then I’ve been doing a live interview once a week, every Thursday at 6 pm. Looking through the videos now available on YouTube and Vimeo, the last one I did was the 9th episode. 9 weeks of live chats and to think I wasn’t sure I could pull off a podcast! Yep, that’s right. Speaking live, trying to entertain people, trying to stop thinking about the fact that people are watching you and you keep laughing nervously and not making any fucking sense at times is more nerve-racking than reading a script and recording your voice which you can then edit.
I could not have done it without the help of some truly brave women out there who came on the show to share their experiences, their stories, to do their bit. I am so excited to get started on Mamma Mu‘s next series of interviews. There are a bunch available on all podcast platforms and here on the blog too, all created with the help of friends who share how they found what felt good to them. Much love. x
