my mummy’s using this big old yellow suitcase to go on a big old trip…without me!
Even at the moment I was clicking on the ‘book now’ icon, I wasn’t really sure if what I was doing was ‘right’. I would be enjoying five whole days with friends I love, in a gorgeous European city, photographing all day,drinking coffee, smoking cigarettes, buying quirky bits and bobs, walking through parks…but without my baby. With only three days to go, how is this going to work, mummy?
The decision to take a trip together sans baby was actually an easy one to take. We really really wanted a break. Actually, scratch that! I NEEDED a break. The combination of a trip to see friends and a massive rock festival was just so tempting-and awesome- we knew we had to bite the bullet.
Since we booked the trip, every night, before I fall asleep, I think about leaving my baby. It kills me. Literally hurts me. I imagine him sobbing, not letting go of my hand, clinging to me, crying Mama Mama! I cry throughout the whole trip and even fall ill. I want nothing but to be with my baby. Needless to say, there have been many sleepless nights around here.
The single most positive aspect of the whole situation-apart from the fact that I’ll be seeing Pearl Jam live! Woohoo!- is that my love, my life, will be in excellent hands. Grandparents that go above and beyond to give my child everything he needs, including a rested mummy. Staying with them, overnight, once a week, has helped Georgie become more adaptable. Even though my mother-in-law has noted every single ‘like’ and ‘habit’ both Georgie and I have, she still does things differently. But that’s OK because the next day, I always pick up a happy baby and that’s all that counts. Five days with their grandson is the biggest gift I could’ve given them. They are looking forward to it so much and this calms me, makes it easier to sleep at night and finally start packing my bags with a smile on my face.
Let’s just hope that when the time comes, my baby lets go of my hand, smiles and waves goodbye.x
