Though divorce rates have begun to decline in recent years, the number still remains high. With all the stresses and demands of day-to-day life, it can be easy to neglect your relationship with your partner. Parents especially find that their relationship with their spouse changes dramatically after having children, in both good ways and bad.
Parents spend so much of their time putting their children’s happiness and health first, leaving little energy for their spouse. However, the wellbeing of you and your partner has an effect on your children as well. A demonstrably loving relationship sets a positive example and makes them feel secure. If you’ve been struggling to find the right balance, here are five tips for reinvesting in your relationship with your partner.
Schedule time for just the two of you
Between caregiving responsibility and employment demands, downtime often doesn’t just organically happen these days.
Make a point to sit down with your partner and schedule a time each week during which you can spend time together alone (this will likely be after the kids have gone to bed). Leave your phones in another room and spend this time being present with one another.
Spend quality time together as a family
Making time for your partner doesn’t have to mean leaving out the kids. Plan simple activities you can do together as a family. It doesn’t have to be elaborate; simply going on a hike or taking a trip to the beach will create lasting memories for your children.
Activities that give the kids the opportunity to go off and entertain themselves have the added bonus of providing you and your partner distraction-free time to reconnect.
Put your partner before your kids
Though it’s okay to include the kids sometimes, remind yourself that putting your partner before your kids doesn’t make you a bad parent or mean that you love your children any less. Giving your kids some space is actually important for their healthy development.
Remember that your partner needs you too, and being there for them when they need it will strengthen your relationship and set a healthy example for your kids.
Do things just for yourself
Many mothers report beliefs that engaging in self-care is selfish. Though it may be a cliché, it is true that you can’t help others until you help yourself. Making sure your needs are met first will give you the energy you need to invest in your family.
Self-care doesn’t have to be elaborate. Even just taking a half hour for a warm bath or spending some time in the morning before everyone wakes up to practice yoga or read a book will make all the difference to your mental health and your ability to support your children and partner.
Reaffirm your vows
Whether you’ve been married for years or marriage just isn’t for you and your partner, take time to formally reaffirm your commitment to one another. If you really want to go the extra mile, look into engagement rings to replace or add to the one you already have.
A vow renewal ceremony doesn’t have to be a huge affair, but there’s something special about surrounding yourself with friends and family to celebrate the relationship that you continue to nurture not out of obligation, but by choice.
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This is a contributed post.
